Did you find your nipples yet?

officialunitedstates:

next time you’re over at your friends’ house ask them if you can “do the dishes.”  they will be incredibly surprised and thankful but will soon wish they never let you near them as you proceed to break them all on your knees while yelling “do is an ambiguous verb”

(via the-final-companion)

(Source: crazlly, via dublininc)

grandmafupa:

Painfully average looking with a great sense of humor and always down to get drunk

(via tranquil-toxins)

(Source: jackxshit, via cyber-leaf)

abomasnow:

hell yeah i’m a catholic i’ve been addicted to cats my whole life

(via pizza)

-cerealguy:

If I had the guts to kill myself I would’ve done it a long time ago.

(Source: milestellers, via heartless)

(Source: pizzaisland, via pizza)

(Source: neogohann, via thunderboobs)